Psyche Souffle (Knead to Know Book 3) Read online

  Phoenix crossed his arms, pleased creases forming around his eyes. “Oh, really? And why is that? Do you find me irresistible?”

  “Hardly.”

  “Alluring?”

  “That pretty much means the same thing.”

  “Tempting.”

  “Still a synonym.”

  He grinned at me.

  “I find you…” I pressed my hand into his chest. “Distracting and you know that. In fact, you do it on purpose. You like to see me squirm.”

  His eyes darkened as they trailed down to my hand, still resting against his chest. The room suddenly felt small. “I haven’t even begun to make you squirm.”

  I hadn’t been with anyone since my ex-boyfriend Baker, so it had been a while. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to. I had almost given into Phoenix a couple times. But even if I could have kept my emotions out of it, I wouldn’t have been able to give him what he wanted. I didn’t have a problem with a little casual sex between friends sometimes. But the half-vampire thing complicated my life more than I ever anticipated. I wasn’t ready to accidentally murder him, or anyone, during sex. I needed to know I had complete control and if tonight proved anything it was that my hunger still held the reins.

  He broke the spell by laughing. “That’s actually not why I’m here.”

  “Oh?”

  “You said you hadn’t made a soufflé before.” I narrowed my eyes. He gave me a slight bow. “At your service.”

  “You make soufflés?” This was certainly a new tactic to get into my pants.

  He moved around my kitchen with ease, collecting everything he needed. He handed me the chocolate and instructed me to chop it and melt it. I watched him butter the soufflé dish and sprinkle it with sugar before I started chopping. He worked carefully and precisely. The cover definitely didn’t match the book when it came to Phoenix. He looked like a Goth punk rock star—dangerous, sexy, and oh-so-deliciously-wicked. And to a degree those things were true, as he enjoyed reminding me on a regular basis. But there was this other side to him: the Phoenix who lived in a former church and liked to cook and was in marching band in high school. They were like two totally different people.

  “Done,” I said.

  “Good. Add cream then melt it over boiling water and stop staring at me.”

  I smiled as I followed his directions. Once the water was boiling, I placed the bowl of chocolate and cream over it, stirring gently until they blended into a thick velvety sauce. I dabbed my finger in it, but couldn’t bring myself to taste it. That one indulgence would only remind me that I would never again know if something tasted as good as it smelled. I held my chocolate dipped finger out toward Phoenix. “Does this look right?”

  He came over, taking a hold of my wrist, gently moving me to a better position. His lips clamped down on my finger and his tongue circled it leisurely until every last drop of chocolate was gone. My eyes fluttered closed. His arm circled my waist as his hand grazed down my arm, reminding me to keep stirring. I fought to keep my breathing even, as images of all the other ways we could enjoy this chocolate came to mind. My next thought was even worse. This was how it could be. This gentle, sweet side of Phoenix. It could be mine if I just stopped pushing him away.

  His lips brushed the side of my neck then just above my collarbone. His hand still guided mine, stirring the chocolate as his thumb softly caressed mine. “It’s done,” he said, taking a step back.

  It took me a moment to recover as he moved the bowl of melted chocolate back to the counter.

  “Add the yolks and salt.”

  I nodded, stirring them into the mixture. “When did you become a jinni?”

  “1998,” he said. “May.”

  “What happened?” The question was a personal one, but no more than someone asking me why I tried to become a vampire, which he already knew.

  He concentrated harder on the egg whites. “My story’s not different than anyone else’s. I was recruited. I accepted and now I’m the well-adjusted jinni who stands before you.”

  I shook my head. “I want your story, Phoenix. Your unique story that is just yours.”

  He handed me the egg whites that had been whipped with sugar until soft peaks formed. “Divide it and really gently fold it into the chocolate.”

  “I can listen while I do this.”

  He laughed, but there wasn’t much humor in it. “I don’t want to talk about my story. Not with you.”

  That hurt more than it probably should have. He knew a lot about my life, especially since becoming a half-vampire. In fact, he was on a very short list of people who actually knew that I was a half-vampire. In comparison, I knew next to nothing about him. I didn’t look at him as I worked and he didn’t try to talk to me further until it was time to fill the soufflé dish and put it in the oven.

  “How’d you learn to bake?” I asked.

  “I had an aunt I used to spend summers with and she taught me how to make all types of things. I’ve always enjoyed cooking. It’s…”

  “Relaxing,” we said at the same time.

  He shifted his gaze, focusing somewhere beyond my shoulder. His strong jaw locked. “No one is in a good place when they make a deal to become a jinni. My story isn’t like yours. You were afraid and instead of giving into the fear, you found a way to survive. What you did was gutsy. What I did was far from that.”

  I touched his cheek. “You don’t have to tell me. I was being nosy. It’s not like we’re dating.”

  “I don’t date.”

  “I know. You’ve told me.” Baker didn’t tell me anything either. I wasn’t falling into that trap again. I let myself fall in love with Baker, but I fell much harder and deeper than he did, which left me in a hole with no hope for escape until I took charge of my life again. I had mostly made peace with what had happened between us because now I understood all he’d been hiding and why—but it was a soul crushing time in my life, and I had less than no desire to ever risk reliving a similar relationship.

  “That’s it.” I thumped Phoenix on the shoulder. “Love at first sight is great and all, but it isn’t real love. Love is built on knowing the other person almost as well as you know yourself. Cupid, in the story, didn’t even let Psyche see him. What if, after all these years, she still doesn’t know how he really feels? What if she thinks he sees her merely as the beautiful prize he managed to win?”

  “They need to talk?”

  I nodded. “If I’m right, then yes. Desperately. He probably doesn’t know her either.”

  “What do we do?”

  I shrugged. How did you make two demigods talk to each other when they hadn’t managed to for thousands of years?

  “What are you doing tomorrow night?” he asked.

  “I don’t have any plans other than what I do every night. And you’re looking at it.”

  Chapter 4

  Phoenix’s soufflé turned out fantastic, or at least it looked great and he swore to me it tasted good. So I whipped up a hazelnut cream and a bourbon whipped cream to serve with it. When Izzy came down, Phoenix had gone home and I was ready for her approval on our signature dessert.

  She tried a bite with a dab of both creams on it, and her eyes closed as the spoon went into her mouth. “Ohmygod.” She took a larger bite. “So good. Where has this been all of my life?”

  “You really like it?”

  She nodded enthusiastically. “We should serve it all the time.” That wasn’t practical, of course, but it was exactly what I wanted to hear. “When did you have time to do this? Didn’t you say Phoenix asked you out?”

  That wasn’t at all what I had told her, but there was no point in arguing about it. I mentioned that I was supposed to go see him last night, but that it was in no way a date. “I did meet him at Xavier’s and then he showed me how to make a soufflé.”

  “Please tell me that is a euphemism.” I laughed. She sighed and shook her head. “Mags, I know you like Boone and he’s hot and handy and super nice, but he’s not ava
ilable. Phoenix, on the other hand, has made himself very, very available to you. That has to count for something. And he got us a liquor license, right? Did he manage to do it?”

  I had forgotten all about asking him about that. Helping me out and spending time with him did count for something, but I wasn’t sure what or how it changed how I felt. “Boone and I are just friends.”

  “You keep saying that, but I see the way you look when you talk about him. That’s not how you feel. He’s only going to hurt you,” Izzy said.

  Boone wasn’t the type to ever purposefully hurt someone, but then again neither was Baker. Phoenix wouldn’t give me what I wanted either, though. What I needed was a mix between the two of them. I needed someone who made me laugh and who wanted me, like Phoenix, but also someone who was nice and helped others and who I could trust, like Boone. Someone should expand on that teddy bear place—create a Build-a-Boyfriend shop. “We should call the dessert Psyche Souffle.”

  Izzy grinned as she moved to her cupcake decorating station. “I love it—and with all the Cupid decorations, it fits perfectly.”

  Izzy had recently gone through a breakup. Facing Valentine’s Day couldn’t be easy for her. What would it take for Kyle to win her back? “If you had one of Cupid’s arrows and you could have scratched Kyle with it to make him fall madly in love with you, would you have?”

  Izzy gave me a strange look. “I don’t know. I guess not? I mean that’s what I wanted. I wanted him to love me and want to marry me, but he didn’t feel the same way. It wouldn’t be fair to force him to. Plus, I deserve better than that. I want someone who I don’t have to force to love me.”

  I nodded. Didn’t we all.

  The rest of the morning melted away in a blur of busyness. And the longer I went without hearing where Psyche was, the more nervous I got. The clock was ticking on Cupid’s deadline. If he hadn’t given us the address by closing, I’d have to find her on my own.

  I was just finishing up my afternoon baking when Izzy poked her head into the kitchen.

  “Hey,” I said. “I already have the box for the shelter made, in case Boone comes by. If he doesn’t, can you drop it off? I think I’m going to leave a little early today. I barely got any sleep last night.”

  “Because you were cooking.”

  I nodded.

  “Do you know what you need, Maggie?” I raised an eyebrow. “You need a big romantic gesture. You need someone to come in here and sweep you off your feet. Someone who can make you believe in love again.”

  I finished putting away the last of the newly cleaned dishes. “I need that like I need another hole in the head. No thanks. I want honesty and loyalty and someone I enjoy spending time with.”

  “Sounds like you need a dog,” Phoenix said, opening the alley door and coming inside, brushing the snow off of his shoulders. I noticed immediately. He wasn’t wearing leather. In fact, he had a suit on. What in the holy hell was happening here? “Izzy, always good to see you.” He kissed her cheek.

  She beamed up at him. “If you have my liquor license, I will propose to you right now.”

  He reached inside his jacket and pulled out an envelope. “Everything you should need, no proposals necessary.”

  “Fantastic. Excellent doing business with you.” She looked back and forth between us. “Well, now your wanting to leave early makes sense. Go, have fun, you two. Take her far away, Phoenix, and don’t let her think. That’s when she gets into trouble.”

  Phoenix smiled. “I’ll do my best.”

  Izzy shoved me toward him and left to go back to the front.

  Phoenix was smiling, but there was something off about him, other than just his clothes. He seemed nervous.

  “You have the address?” I asked

  “Sure do,” he said. “You have time to pay her a visit?”

  It didn’t really matter if I did or not. I nodded. “The baking is done for the day and Izzy and Emery can handle what’s left.”

  He led me to a black town car with darkly tinted windows and opened the back door. I climbed in. “I’m still wearing last night’s clothes. Should I go home and change? I feel underdressed all of a sudden.”

  “You look fine,” he said, not actually looking at me. Instead he pulled out his phone and started typing.

  I crossed my legs, bouncing my foot up and down as I brushed splotches of flour off my skirt. The driver pulled away from curb and we were off. “Where are we going?”

  He handed me an address that meant nothing to me. “Let me do the talking this time,” he said. “I’ll feel her out before you start feeding her head with ideas.”

  I laughed. Maybe he was nervous I’d piss off a second god in as many days. Fair enough. “You mean she might start thinking for herself. Oh, the horror!”

  His jaw tightened. “You aren’t going to make this easy.”

  I kicked his leg softly. “I promise I’ll stay out of it. I’ll let you handle it unless it looks like you need my help.”

  Signs of life finally came back into his face. “I love the qualifier. It leaves the entire situation very open to interpretation.”

  “I learned from the best.”

  “Yeah. Olivia.” Phoenix put his phone away. “I don’t think Cupid’s bluffing. He wants her back. Word is she left and he’s refusing to use his magic or do anything until she comes back. To the point that even Venus has taken notice. We don’t need the attention of the gods, especially after Holda.”

  I nodded. “I’m fed. My temper is under control. I won’t fly off the handle. I promise I can do this.”

  His mouth pressed into a thin line. “Your reaction may have been at least partly my fault.”

  I turned toward him. “How?”

  He shook his head. “We’ll talk later. How about dinner after we finish here?”

  I nodded. I didn’t eat, but I’d be happy to sit with Phoenix while he did. He obviously had something on his mind. “Sure.”

  “We’re here,” he said, opening the door as soon as the car stopped.

  In front of us was a beautiful building with unobstructed views of Lake Michigan. Phoenix redirected the doorman and up we went to the top floor. The elevator opened into a hallway with a single door. He rang the bell.

  Moments later a woman who made the word “beautiful” seem completely inadequate answered. Her golden hair fell around her tall willowy frame. The loose white dress she wore was short and much more appropriate for summer than February.

  “Ah, Cupid has sent minions,” she said, stepping back and opening the door wider. “Come in.”

  Phoenix looked as shocked as I felt, but we followed her in. She sat on the couch and crossed her legs. “You don’t need to fret. I’m going to go back.” She didn’t sound angry or upset. She was calm. “Venus already spoke with me, but I needed to make him understand.”

  I looked to Phoenix. He’d wanted to handle this, so it was all his.

  Phoenix nodded. “Understand what?”

  The suite was magnificent. Everything was gold and white. The light fixture above the white, lacquered dining room table was a golden sunburst. The low white sofa was made from the softest most lush material I had ever felt and the throw pillows covered with soft fur. The only item that wasn’t glossy and perfect and the height of elegant style was a worn novel on the end table next to her. She folded her hands in her lap. “Worlds come and go, but we have an eternity together—one that could be heaven or a hell, depending on him. I don’t want to live separate lives.”

  Phoenix sat back with a frown. “But you are going back?”

  “Eventually.” She stood.

  “He will destroy us all if ‘eventually’ doesn’t come before the fourteenth.”

  Her smile faded into a sigh. “He hasn’t learned his lesson.”

  “And … ” I faltered, forgetting I wasn’t supposed to talk, but what was done was done. “What lesson is that exactly?”

  She looked pained—then slightly peeved that we hadn’t taken h
er at her word that she’d deal with things and left already. “It’s of no concern to mortal spies. He knows what I want from him. And if he doesn’t then we are further gone than even I thought.”

  Phoenix sighed, his jaw tightening.

  “Have you told him?” I asked.

  Her beautiful gaze turned toward me. “Not that I owe any of you an explanation, but yes, I have told him. In a million different ways. He chooses not to hear me.”

  We had all been there. The things women thought we were being clear on didn’t always translate into the brain of the opposite sex. “I guess an eternity with someone you barely know is hard.”

  She looked away. “It’s impossible. Destroying your world in a temper tantrum isn’t going to change that. I need him to show me that he can think of someone besides for himself.”

  “And if he can do that?” I asked.

  “I will try again.”

  “I honestly do think that he’s starting to see that. He loves you. Please just talk to him once more before you doom our world. Give us a chance to help the two of you.”

  “Why should I? I’m not sure I am ready to go back. Worlds come and go. I have no attachment to yours. If he chooses to destroy it, I’ll find a new one and a new one after. I will find as many as it takes for him to grow up.”

  Sparing human lives obviously wasn’t going to be a pull for her. “After all the years you have spent together, wouldn’t you like to finally get to know him? Making him learn a lesson like this is fine, but what will it really change? This isn’t only his fault. You can’t give him hints and expect him to decipher them. The two of you need to sit down and talk. Learning to communicate with each other is much more meaningful than making him submit.”

  She didn’t fidget or move as she stared down at me. “Would you give him such a chance?”

  I nodded. “I like to think it’s never too late to fall in love.”

  “Because it saves your world?” Her voice was cold.

  “Because I’m a romantic. I believe in lasting love built on mutual respect and friendship.” I squinted at the book on the table. I couldn’t quite see it, but it was clearly a romance novel. “I think you do too.”